How to Throw a Proper {Baby} Shower - Part 1

Some would say I've earned the title of Baby Shower Thrower Extraordinaire. I would say it hasn't been intentional. I think it's just because I have lots of friends who've had babies, so I've been involved in planning lots of baby showers in the last few years.

I thoroughly enjoy the entire baby shower throwing process. Especially if it's a shower for a dear friend. I think it's my love language. I find such joy in planning, creating, baking, shopping, and decorating. I love it all...down to the very last detail for each baby shower.

So. Since I have a few showers under my belt, I think now is a great time to share with you the process I go through when I'm planning a baby shower. Maybe you can pick up a few tips and tricks to use at the next shower you are throwing. This process can be adapted for bridal showers and kids' birthday parties, as well.

Note: These are simply my opinions. I am not a professional event planner. I think I'd enjoy doing that one day, but for now, I'm just a regular old person who likes to throw showers.

How to Throw a Proper {Baby} Shower - Part 1

Step #1: Find a co-host or five. Showers can be expensive. There is no sense in throwing one by yourself. The least amount of money I've ever spent was $100, and that was with 3 co-hosts, for a dessert shower with only 12 guests. If you throw a shower by yourself, you will be forking out a ton of cash. Yes, things can be accomplished on a budget, but I'm just here to tell you that it all adds up. It's best to have one or two co-hosts that will agree to split the cost, and hopefully the responsibilities.

Step #2: Plan an initial meeting with your co-hosts. This meeting should be 2-3 months before the shower, if possible. At the meeting, do steps 3 & 4.

Step #3: Choose a theme. This is so very important. The theme determines everything. Be inventive. Ask the mom-to-be how she plans to decorate the nursery. If that doesn't give you a great idea, search the internet. There are lots of ideas. I will say there's nothing wrong with the traditional pink and brown or blue and brown, but they have been done. A lot. Try something new. Even if your theme is just based on two or three colors, use a combination that your guests won't expect. Yellow and grey. Teal and orange. Get creative.

Step #4: Choose a date, time, and location. You will want to coordinate the date and time with your mom-to-be. She may need a specific day, if she has out of town family that will be coming in for the shower. Be considerate, and plan around her requests. This is her special day, after all. The location will determine (or be determined by) how many guests she wants to invite. Now is a good time to get her to start thinking about her invite list. Personally, I think it's fine to go ahead and choose a location and then tell the mom-to-be how many guests will fit at that location. For one shower I threw recently, we were able to use a beautiful event facility that held 40-50 women. Many times, however, we are in someone's home, and the comfortable number is closer to 25. Your budget will be a big factor in determining the location. If you do choose someone's home, make sure it's comfortable and as convenient as possible for the guests.

Step #5: Order invitations (6-8 weeks before the shower). Oh, the invitations. This is my favorite part. I will admit that I'm a bit of an invitation snob. I really believe that the invitation sets the tone for the entire shower. If you want to throw a nice, memorable shower for someone, you need to have beautiful invitations. They don't necessarily have to cost a jillion dollars, but they should be special. They should be printed on a nice quality card stock. Not photo paper. And please, no evites. (There is one exception to the evite rule: if it's a shower where you're inviting, say, your entire church, I think an evite is acceptable.) Two of the sites I like to use for invitations are www.minted.com and and www.smallfri.com. One thing I've done lately is to find an original design on www.etsy.com. There are many creative designers on etsy who have beautiful designs on their sites, and if you don't see something you like, most will design just about anything for you. Most charge $12-$16 for a pdf image of the design, and then you can have it printed wherever you like. Lots of them also have an option where they will print the invitations for you. If you print them yourself, one option would be your local Kinkos or UPS Store. I've had better luck with some than with others. My favorite thing to do is have the invitations printed at a professional printing press, but I will admit it's not cheap. It's about $2 per invitation, including the design. One etsy designer I've worked with and thoroughly enjoyed is WestWillow. NOTE: In general, assume 20% of the invitees will not be able to attend. NOTE #2: I've found that having "regrets only" on the invitation is more likely to elicit responses than having "please RSVP", although people still don't respond.

Step #6: Mail the invitations (one month prior to the shower). You will need a final list of invitees from your mom-to-be. It's best to get the invitations in the mail a month before the shower. Some of you may wonder if you should hand write the envelopes or use labels. I'd say that depends on your handwriting. If you have nice penmanship, it's fine to hand write them. If your handwriting looks like a 2nd grader's, it's probably best to use labels. Depending on the color of your envelopes, you may want to get the clear labels so that they don't stand out like a sore thumb against a colored envelope. Another option is to enlist the help of someone with nice handwriting. If I had poor handwriting, this would be my choice.

Step #7: Meet with co-hosts for a detailed planning meeting. At this meeting, try to make decisions about as many details as possible. You will want to talk about the menu, decor, favors, games, and the timeline for the shower. Delegate tasks to everyone's strengths. If you have a creative person in your midst, put them in charge of favor tags, cupcake toppers, centerpieces, etc. If you have a baker, let her do the cupcakes or cake. Try to make sure everyone has about the same amount of things to do so that no one is overwhelmed.

• Menu - Your menu will depend on the time of day of the shower, as well as the theme. If it's a 5 o'clock shower, you will need more food than you would at 2 o'clock. Try to choose foods that coordinate with your theme. For instance, I recently hosted a circus-themed shower, so we served popcorn and corndogs, among other things. Be sure to include drinks. You will also want to decide if you are having a cake or cupcakes. Cupcakes are all the rage right now, but a cake is always a beautiful centerpiece.

• Decor - Your theme is key here. Use your theme to determine every bit of the decor. Incorporate details, such as the baby's monogram on cupcake toppers. Buy plates and napkins that match your theme. If you are hosting a high tea or another type of formal shower, you will want to use real plates or china. Using real plates is a great way to cut down on cost. Of course, you have to wash the dishes at the end, but real plates certainly add a touch of elegance to any shower. Other things to think about for decor: centerpieces, candles, fresh flowers, tablecloths, wall decorations such as banners, balloons, and the list goes on. Something I really enjoyed at a baby shower that was thrown for me was a blessing tree. The shower hosts put decorative branches in a vase and had little cards for guests to write down blessings, wishes, advice, or favorite scriptures for me and the baby. Each guest hung their card on the tree. I still have the blessing tree and cards in Layla's room. Your mom-to-be may appreciate something other than a blessing tree, but some type of keepsake is always nice. Here's a picture of another blessing tree that we did for a friend, using a live crepe myrtle.

• Favors - My opinion on favors is that they should be practical or edible. I tend to go with edible. I've used sugar cookies in the shape of a Christmas ornament decorated with the baby's monogram at a Christmas shower, brownie bites in cute little burlap bags at a shabby chic shower, little pails of m&m's at a nautical shower. The favor is a great place to use the baby's monogram, or maybe a Bible verse that is meaningful to the mom-to-be. Be creative. Definitely coordinate with the theme. And think details. If you need ideas, use the internet. There are lots and lots of fun ideas out there. Try searching google images and seeing what pictures are posted of other peoples' baby shower favors.

• Games - Check with your mom-to-be to see if she likes playing shower games first. If so, choose two or three games that you've enjoyed playing at other baby showers. With all the showers I've thrown and attended, I've played lots of games. Some of my personal favorites are baby shower bingo, a version of The Price is Right where guests have to estimate the price of baby items, and the baby attribute quiz (a list of baby's attributes is given to the guests, and they have to guess whether mom-to-be wants baby to inherit each attribute from mom or dad). I think it's fun to have real prizes for the games. Plus, it makes people want to participate. Scented candles, stationary, and small home decor items are great choices. Marshall's and TJMaxx are good places to shop for game prizes. I try not to spend more than $5-$7 per prize, sometimes $10. For the prizes, use gift bags or wrapping paper that coordinates with your theme, and display them as part of your decor. One idea I've used and have seen done a few times is to also give a prize to the mom-to-be for each game. These would be inexpensive baby items, maybe things on her registry. I don't think this is necessary, but it's a nice touch. I'd say if you're already spending a lot of money on the shower, skip this part. If it's going to be a small shower, and you haven't had to spend much, maybe give the mom-to-be a prize for each game to help get her stocked with baby items.

• Timeline - Write down, or at least discuss, the general flow of the shower. Do you want to open with a prayer or a devotional? A blessing for the food? Who will say the blessing? Who will be the spokesperson for the day? Will you play games after eating or after gifts? Make these decisions now, so that you won't be caught off guard on the day of.

Part 2 of this post is coming soon! It will cover steps #8-17. Stay tuned.