I'm feeling that way today.
I honestly struggle with how to handle it. I know it's silly, but I want to pray for everyone that I know needs prayer, especially those I've told "I'll be praying for you." But the reality is, I also have two kids, laundry, dishes, Derrick's client event to help with, dinner, baths, etc.
I have realized in recent months (maybe years) that one key to finding time to pray for everyone is to actually make time to pray. It seems obvious, but it's so easy for me to spend my day doing all the other things that need to get done, only to find that I'm exhausted at bedtime. I lay down with the intention of covering my loved ones in prayer, when in reality I fall asleep about 30 seconds later, and boom...nobody got prayed for. And more importantly, I did not spend any time in direct connection with my Lord and Savior. Praying for people is a good thing, but it's even more important to spend time talking to and listening to the Lord...not always filling up every moment with something I'm asking for. Ya know?
I'm not perfect. I'm so far from perfect. I really wish I could be perfect. I am a bit of a perfectionist, so I suppose it's normal to want to be perfect. Plus, the Lord calls us to strive for perfection (Matthew 5:48), so it really is normal to be dissatisfied with imperfection. Or at least, that's how I justify my perfectionism. Got that?
I digress. What I wanted to say was that I'm not perfect, and far too many days go by where I do not pray as I should. Or as I want to. Days go by when I do not open my Bible. I'm ashamed, really, to admit it, but it's the truth.
If I were to step back and look at my life as whole, I would say I pray and study the Word far more regularly now than I ever have, but that's only by the grace of God. He has shown me the importance of daily spending time with him, reading about Him and talking to Him. My days are so much calmer when I am focused on Him, as an overflow of the time we spend together. Why, then, do I let days go by without focusing?
Which brings me back to the point of this post. My lengthy list.
Well, I guess the point is twofold. One, to admit my sinful ways, in hopes that admitting the truth will make me get more serious about my commitment to prayer and quiet time. More importantly, I want to share with you a few of the people at the top of my prayer list, in hopes that you might lift up a short prayer for them when you read their stories. I know each of them can use all the prayer they can get.
Eli Phillips - 18 months old, doctors discovered Tuesday that he had a (very likely) malignant tumor on his kidney, underwent 4 hours of surgery today as they removed one entire kidney (along with a very large tumor), is recovering in the PICU, doctors are doing biopsies of his lymph nodes to make sure the cancer hasn't spread
Please pray that the lymph nodes come back clear. Pray for peace and strength for his mommy & daddy too.
Diana Johnston - my aunt, admitted to ICU this morning with blood sugar over 500, she's a diabetic and has a history of not managing her sugar well in times of stress
Please pray for her health as well as for her in general. She's going through a rough patch.
Jeff Allen - a dear high school friend who was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease a few years ago and has had lots of medical issues related to it, underwent a colostomy within the last year in hopes of preventing further issues only to wind up having to have another surgery this week where they removed the rest of his colon, is having a tough time recovering from the surgery
Please pray for his health and recovery.
If you do lift up prayers for them, I really appreciate it. I know I can always feel it when people are covering me in prayer, and I want all three of these people to feel that way. It's so meaningful to know other people are interceding for you in your time of need. Don't you think?
Well, that's it for today. If you made it to the end of this post, you're a trooper. Thanks for listening to me ramble, and most importantly, thanks for lifting these sweet people up in prayer. The Lord is good, and His will is always perfect. That, I know, is true.
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